Retrospective - Indiana Jones (1981-2008)

         Hey guys, Chuck here, and welcome to the first of several series retrospectives for the year 2023. For the first of these retrospectives, I'm taking a look at the adventure franchise Indiana Jones , created by George Lucas and Steven Spielberg, and starring Harrison Ford as Henry "Indiana" Jones Jr, or Indy for short. 

         The idea for the series came to George Lucas while working on the Star Wars franchise, as he looked to create a movie called Raiders of the Lost Ark, which would be inspired by the action-adventure serials of the '30s and '40s. Spielberg, who had long sought to direct one of the James Bond films, was approached by Lucas to direct Raiders, to which Spielberg agreed on the condition that they change the main protagonist's name from Indiana Smith to Indiana Jones, and I think that we're all the better for that one. Casting the role was a long process, as Spielberg wanted Harrison for the role, but Lucas didn't want Harrison to become his "Bobby DeNiro," referencing how fellow director Martin Scorsese would often feature actor Robert DeNiro in a leading role in one of his films. Actors like Tom Selleck and Tim Matheson we're screen tested, and Selleck almost got the role of it weren't for scheduling conflicts with the television series Magnum P.I. Eventually, Lucas and Spielberg settled on Harrison, and thus where we are today. 

       So, Raiders of the Lost Ark was released in 1981, and opens in Peru, in the year 1936, with Indy on a hunt for a sacred Golden Idol. We all know the segment, traversing through the jungle, Indy and a guide named Satipo heading into the temple, the temple falling apart, Satipo leaving Indy behind and meeting his death, Indy reclaiming his whip and the idol, and finally Indy escaping a massive spherical boulder only to be surrounded by several natives called Hovitos, who are working with Indy's rival, French archaeologist Rene Belloq. Indy escapes and catches a plane from Indy's pilot friend Jock Lindsey, who has a pet snake named Reggie. 

      Returning home, Indy is shown to be a college teacher, and after a lecture is greeted by his friend Marcus Brody, who is a museum curator. Brody takes Indy to meet two Army Intelligence agents regarding messages intercepted from Nazis digging in Egypt. The messages reference Tanis, the Well of Souls, and Indy's mentor Dr. Abner Ravenwood. Realizing what this means, Indy tells the agents about the Ark of the Covenant, which was the vessel used to carry around the original stone tablets upon which the Ten Commandments we're inscribed. Yes, THOSE Ten Commandments. Realizing that the only way to Abner is his daughter, Marion, Indy heads off to Nepal to meet her and find Abner before the Nazis do. 

       Indy meets up with Marion, who tells him that her father is, unfortunately, dead. Later, Nazis led by Arnold Toht arrive seeking the head piece of the Staff of Ra, which Abner had in his possession and is now in Marion's possession. Indy shows up to help, and a fight breaks out, resulting in the bar burning down, and Marion going with Indy to Egypt. In Egypt, Indy and Marion meet a local named Sallah, along with his family, and upon reading the head piece, they realize that the Nazis were digging in the wrong place. Marion is taken by the Nazis, but gets decent treatment by Belloq, who is working with them. Upon reaching the Map Room, Indy is shown the true location of the Well of Souls, and he and Sallah dig it up, finding a chamber filled with deadly asps, leading to Indy's iconic line "Snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes." 

       Indy and Sallah pick up the Ark, and Belloq demands it in exchange for Marion. The Ark is lifted out of the Well, and Marion is tossed into it. Indy and Marion escape, and they work with Sallah to recover the Ark, and Sallah later charters them passage on a ship captained by a man named Katanga. Belloq and the Nazis reclaim the Ark and Marion and head to an island in the Aegean Sea, with Indy in tow. Indy rescues Marion, but both are tied up as Belloq, Toht, and Col. Dietrich open the Ark. The energy that is meant to be the Power of God is unleashed and all of the Nazis are killed by it, with Dietrich's head caving in, Toht's face melting, and Belloq's head exploding. Indy and Marion return to Washington, and the Army Intelligence agents tell them that the Ark is being monitored by "top men," who seal it in a crate in an air hanger warehouse in the Nevada Desert. Yep, the U.S. government locks the Ark up in Area 51. 

       Okay, so as far as action movies go, this is one of the more fun out there. Harrison Ford and Karen Allen are both excellent as Indy and Marion, and I enjoyed seeing John Rhys-Davies as Sallah. The settings including Peru, Nepal, and Egypt were absolutely phenomenal, and the set designs for the Peruvian Temple and the Well of Souls we're top notch. Lastly, I gotta commend ILM for the work they did in the sequence where the Power of God emerged from the Ark. Honestly, too much has already been said about this one, so I won't say more. Raiders of the Lost Ark gets a rating of 5/5. 

       Alright, so, 1984 saw the release of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, which is set in the year 1935, making it a prequel to Raiders of the Lost Ark. We start off at Club Obi-Wan in Shanghai, where Indiana Jones and his friend Wu Han meeting with club owner and crime boss Lao Che, who hired Indy to recover the remains of Emperor Nurhachi. Indy also meets club singer Willie Scott, who Lao honestly couldn't care less about. Lao also reveals to have poisoned Indy, who returns the diamond he got in exchange for Nurhachi to get the antidote. A massive commotion ensues with Willie chasing the diamond and Indy chasing the antidote. Willie gets to the antidote, and Indy makes his way towards her, and the two escape and land into a car down below. Driving the car is a kid named Short Round, or Shorty as a nickname, who gets Indy and Willie to a local airport, where Art Weber tells them that their plane charter is a cargo with live poultry. 

      Unfortunately, the cargo plane belongs to Lao, who has his men drain out the fuel line and jump, sending Indy, Willie, and Shorty to their deaths in the Himalayas. The three escape in an emergency raft, sledding down the mountains and eventually landing in a river that takes them into India. Local villagers take them in, feed them, and request their help. Apparently, men from Pankot Palace came in the night, stole a sacred stone they call "shivalinga," and kidnap all the children in the village. One of the children returns, and hands Indy a piece of tapestry with an image revealing what the sacred stone really is: one of the legendary Sankara Stones. Indy, Willie, and Shorty head out by elephant to Pankot Palace, where they meet Chattar Lal, who invites them to a feast hosted by the Maharaja, a child named Zalim Singh. Also in attendance is Captain Philip Blumburtt of the British Army, who has a conversation with Lal and Indy regarding the Thuggee, a cult of fanatics that were based in Pankot Palace and worshipped Kali. Maharaja Singh also speaks of the Thuggee, and assures that such things will never happen again as long as he rules in Pankot. 

      After the feast, Indy and Willie return to their rooms, and Indy is nearly killed by an assassin. After this encounter, he finds a hidden passage in Willie's room, and he, Willie, and Shorty investigate it to find the catacombs beneath Pankot serving as a ritual ground for the Thuggee, now under the leadership of Mola Ram, who performs a ritual ceremony where he rips a man's heart out, and lowers him into a chamber filled with magma, and the man is burned to death by the heat of the magma. We also see that the sacred stone from the village is indeed a Sankara Stone, and the Thuggee have three of them. The kidnapped children are being forced to dig in the catacombs to find the remaining Sankara Stones. Indy is caught, and forced to drink a foul liquid, this putting him into the Black Sleep of Kali. Mola Ram then attempts to sacrifice Willie, but Indy is freed from his trance by Shorty, who burns him with a torch. This is later used by Shorty to do the same with the Maharaja. Now free, Indy, Willie, and Shorty recover the Stones, free the children, and escape the catacombs. Outside, they cross a wooden bridge, only to come face to face with Mola Ram. Indy snaps the bridge in half, sending several Thuggee to the river below, where they're feasted on by crocodiles. Mola Ram tries to take the Stones, but Indy invokes Shiva, causing the Stones to light up and heat up, two of them falling into the river, followed by Mola Ram, who does. Indy returns the last stone to the village, along with the children, and he, Willie, and Shorty head off to more adventures. 

       Okay, so this is my personal favorite Indiana Jones movie, but I will admit that it isn't without issues. For example, the racially insensitive depictions of Indian culture, particularly those of the Thuggee, are quite honestly messed up. However, the performances of Amrish Puri as Mola Ram, Roshan Seth as Chattar Lal, Philip Stone as Captain Blumburtt, and Ke Huy Kwan as Short Round are phenomenal. Heck, I even enjoyed Dan Aykroyd making a cameo as Art Weber. Unfortunately, I must agree with the masses that Kate Capshaw was just inhumanly annoying as Willie. Her screaming and antics were just irritating. In fact, I am agreeing with the Nostalgia Critic in labeling Willie as number one on his list of "Top 11 Dumbasses in Distress." However, what I like about it is the darker tone and the Indian setting. The set designs of Pankot Palace and the Thuggee catacombs was just spectacular, and the train car chase scene, as well as the bridge scene, was just spectacular. So, with that said, I'm giving Temple of Doom a rating of 4.75/5. 

       Alright, so 1989 saw the release of the third movie, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. We open with a prologue where a teenage Indiana Jones follows a band of robbers, led by a fedora-wearing man named Garth, who are digging for a lost artifact: the Cross of Coronado. Indy takes it, and rides off towards a circus train. A chase ensues, and it showcases how Indy got his paralyzing fear of snakes, how he got.the scar on his chin, and how he is skilled with a bullwhip. Upon returning home, Indy attempts to show the Cross to his father, who has him recite instead. However, Garth and his men are brought by the sheriff, who is summoned by Indy's friend. The sheriff forces Indy to give up the Cross, and it is handed over Panama Hat, who hired Garth and his men to fetch the Cross. Garth tells Indy "You lost today, kid. But that doesn't mean you have to like it," and gifts Indy with his fedora. Jump ahead to the year 1938, and Indy is on a boat, where he comes face to face with Panama Hat, and reclaims the Cross of Coronado after all these years. The boat is blown up, and Indy escapes with the Cross in hand. 

        Returning to Marshall College, Indy is back at teaching again, and he gives the Cross to Brody, who is now the college Dean, having retired from his museum job. Indy later is approached by men representing Walter Donovan, who was working with Indy's father Henry to find the Holy Grail. Indy, who had received his father's journal, goes to Venice and meets with his father's contact Elsa Schneider, and the two head to a library with Brody, who is a long for the ride this time around. Indy locates the hidden entrance to an underground tomb of one of three knights who sought the Grail, thus finishing a map based on the Knight's shield. His father had already started the map, but the shield was broken and thus the map incomplete until Indy finished it. Indy and Elsa enter a chase with the Brotherhood of the Cruciform Sword, who swore an oath to protect the Grail's location. Indy, however, is only seeking his father, thus not an issue for the Brotherhood. 

        Indy and Elsa eventually head to Castle Brunwald in Austria, where Indy saves his father, only to reveal that both Elsa and Donovan are working with the Nazis. Indy and Henry escape from the castle and diverge to Berlin to recover the journal, and they head out to the deserts of Hatay, where Sallah is waiting. Unfortunately, Brody was captured by the Nazis earlier in Iskenderun, and so now Indy, Henry, and Sallah have to rescue him while en route to the canyon of the Crescent Moon. After a pretty kickass chase involving a tank, everyone eventually arrives at the entrance of the Grail Temple, located inside of the canyon of the Crescent Moon. It's also revealed that there are three tests, all based on three clues in Henry's journal. Donovan shoots Henry, forcing Indy to go. The first test is based on the following clue: "The Breath of God. Only the penitent man will pass." Figuring out what this means, Indy drops to his knees to avoid being beheaded, and eventually finds a way to deactivate a set of circular blades. The next test: "The Word of God. Only in His footsteps may he proceed." Looking at all of the letters on the floor, Indy realizes that it's meant as the true name of God: Jehovah. Stepping at first on the letter "J," Indy remembers that in the Latin alphabet, Jehovah begins with an "I," not a "J." So, Indy steps on the letter in order: "IEHOVA." The final test: "The Path of God. Only a Leap from the Lion's Head will he prove his worth." Indy takes a minute to figure it out, realizing it's a Leap of Faith. Taking a step out, he finds a Path below, and walks across, tossing some rubble to give Donovan and Elsa a path to follow. 

       Indy arrives in the Grail Chamber, where a Knight of the Crusades is guarding the Grail. Donovan drinks from a fake Grail, and loses his life. Indy, however, chooses correctly, but is warned against taking the Grail passed a Seal near the Entrance. Indy heals his father with water from the Grail, but Elsa attempts to take it, walking passed the seal, and causing the Temple to fall apart. Elsa dies attempting to reach the Grail. Indy attempts the same, and his father tells him to "let it go." Indy, Henry, Sallah, and Brody escape the collapsing Temple, and it's here where it's revealed that Indy's name is Henry Jones Jr, and his preferred name of Indiana was taken from the family dog. The four ride out of the canyon and off into the sunset, ending the movie. 

       Okay, so The Last Crusade is definitely more in line with Raiders than it is with Temple of Doom. Lucas and Spielberg definitely got back to a lot of what made people love the Indiana Jones franchise in the first place, and I definitely enjoyed every minute of it. Having the Holy Grail be the artifact to hunt for this time is really cool, and I definitely like the simplistic design of the Grail itself. 

        Seeing the returns of John Rhys-Davies as Sallah and Denholm Elliott as Brody was fantastic, and I enjoyed the addition of Sean Connery as Henry. River Phoenix was definitely a fantastic choice for the teenage Indy, and nice touch making him a Boy Scout, with a Life rank. Julian Glover, who is best known for his work in movies like The Empire Strikes Back and For Your Eyes Only, was definitely an intriguing villain as Donovan. Not pure evil like Mola Ram nor a rival archaeologist like Belloq, but definitely an interesting antagonist for Indy in this movie. I also enjoyed Allison Doody as Elsa, who was definitely an improvement over Kate Capshaw as Willie, although not quite as good as Karen Allen as Marion. 

        The set designs, the action, and the prop designs are definitely fantastic, as should be expected for an Indiana Jones movie. Overall, this is definitely another favorite of mine in this series, and definitely an improvement over Temple of Doom. I'm giving The Last Crusade a rating of 4.95/5. Definitely one to watch for Indy fans. 

      And now, we unfortunately come to the fourth film in the series. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was released in 2008, which was the year we got such excellent films as Iron Man, The Dark Knight, and Hellboy II: The Golden Army. This, unfortunately, was one of the worst films of 2008, and definitely the worst film of the Indiana Jones franchise. 

      We open in the year 1957, where agents of the Soviet KGB have Indy and his friend George "Mac" MicHale in hand at Area 51, where Irina Spalko has Indy find a package that he was part of an excavation team for. They do find the package, which is some kind of extraterrestrial remains. Eeewww. Anyway, Max betrays Indy, who escapes and finds himself in a model town in the middle of a nuclear test site. Indy manages to stuff himself into a lead-lined refrigerator and survives the nuclear blast. Now, I get that the fridge was lined with lead, but that's just stupid. I mean just the distance alone that he would have been flung by the blast, not to mention how much the rolling and banging around would have definitely left Indy concussed, or possibly dead. What were Lucas and Spielberg thinking, man? Seriously. 

       Anyway, two FBI Agents have Indy decontaminated, and they accuse him of being allied with the Soviets based on his friendship with Mac. Luckily, Indy is bailed out by Army General Ross, who clears him of any treasonous claims. Unfortunately, upon Indy's return to Marshall College, the current Dean, Charles Stanforth reveals that he's resigned to prevent Indy from losing his job. Later, a greaser named Mutt Williams recruits Indy to help him find Harold Oxley aka Ox, who was studying Crystal Skulls and their connection to the legend of Akator. Apparently, Ox found a skull in Peru, and Indy and Mutt go after him, as apparently the skull drove him insane, returning it to where he found it. Heading there, Indy and Mutt pick up the skull, but realize that Ox was meant to return the skull to Akator. Indy and Mutt are picked up by Spalko and her forces, who have not only Ox, but also Marion Ravenwood, who is Mutt's mother. She reveals to Indy that Mutt's full name is Henry Jones III, making Indy his father. Oops. 

       Okay, so, Indy, Ox, Marion, and Mutt join up to race against Spalko and her Soviet followers to Akator. Mac joins up acting as a double agent, which is later shown to be false, and upon arriving at Akator, we see a massive round room with massive crystal skeletons, which belonged to beings from another world. Yep, we've got aliens in this movie. Anyway, with the skull restored, the skeletons join into a single form, and Spalko, who seeks their secret, has her mind filled with so much knowledge from their world that her mind is destroyed. The alien craft takes off, and the water washes away any evidence of Akator. Oh, and Mac dies too. Who cares though, right? 

        So, the movie ends with Stanforth reinstated as Dean, with Indy as Associate Dean, and Indy and Marion finally get married after who knows how many years of waiting. 

        Okay, so, there's a lot to unpack with Crystal Skull, but I won't dive back into the fridge scene again. Once is enough. Well, as far as having the villains be Soviets, it makes sense given the movie was set at the height of the Cold War. Cate Blanchett was a decent villain, but not iconic like Belloq or Mola Ram. Inclusions like Jim Broadbent as Stanforth and John Hurt as Ox were nice, and both are actors I've enjoyed through the years. And, it was nice to get Karen Allen back as Marion, who is still the gold standard when it comes to the women of Indiana Jones. 

        But the one cast member everyone harps on is Shia Labeouf as Mutt. Okay, while I definitely don't buy him as this badass greaser punk, I don't think Shia was a terrible actor as Mutt. Do I think that the character was written terribly? You betcha. But that's no fault of Shia's. Hell, even Ray Winstone, who I've enjoyed in other movies throughout the years, was awful in this movie as Mac. Hell, I was more annoyed with Mac than I was with Mutt. 

         The whole alien plot just didn't fit within the world of Indiana Jones, but apparently the movie was taking inspiration from the classic sci-fi B-movies of the '50s like The Day the Earth Stood Still, When Worlds Collide, and so on, so I get it. But honestly, it didn't really need to go the direction it did. And, of course, there's the whole "knowledge was the real treasure" bull crap at the end, which seriously. Lucas, Spielberg, I'm a fan of both of you guys. That was the one move that made you guys seem less like brilliant storytellers and more like sappy old geezers. Lastly, everyone harps on "Oh, the CGI looked God awful, the Akator set looked like a reject from Legends of the Hidden Temple." Blah blah blah blah blah. Honestly, I've seen cheaper set designs in a majority of Star Trek movies, so let's not go there, okay? Yeah, the sets and effects aren't as iconic as the earlier Indiana Jones movies, but they could have been way, way, way worse. 

         On the whole, this is my least favorite of the series, and I usually restrict myself to only watching it whenever I binge the entire series. Other than that, I just watch the original three. But, although it's my least favorite, I don't completely hate the movie, unlike everyone who still wants a refund of their ticket money after fifteen years. Geez, is that's how long it's been? Damn, I'm getting old. Well, with that said, I'm giving Kingdom of the Crystal Skull a rating of 3.15/5. And believe me, that's being generous. 

       Okay guys, that'll wrap up my retrospective on the Indiana Jones series. We'll be talking about Indy this summer when the newest film in the franchise, Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, hits theaters. Until then, this is Chuck signing off, and I'll see you guys in Monday when we take a journey with Disney that goes 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.