12 Reviews of Christmas - The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special (2022)

           Hey guys, Chuck here, and the it's the most wonderful time of the year. That's right, guys. 12 Reviews of Christmas is back. I've hyped it up for the last several weeks, and now it's finally time. So, let's kick off this year's 12 Reviews of Christmas with a real banger with Marvel Studios' The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special. Released on November 25th as a Disney+ original special, this 45-minute Yuletide short stars Chris Pratt, Dave Bautista, Pom Klementieff, Karen Gillan, Sean Gunn, Kevin Bacon, with special musical performances by the music group the Old 97's, and voice performances by Bradley Cooper, Maria Bakalova, Michael Rooker, and Vin Diesel, and was written and directed by James Gunn. 

          So, we open with an animated flashback from Peter Quill's childhood, where he tries to have a celebration of the Earth holiday of Christmas with the Ravagers, an idea that is shot down by Yondu almost instantly, seeing it as merely sentiment and nothing else. We learn that this flashback is part of a story being told by Kraglin to his fellow Guardians Drax, Mantis, and Nebula. Yeah, ever since the events of both Avengers: Endgame and Thor: Love & Thunder, both Kraglin and Nebula are members of the Guardians of the Galaxy. Anyway, part of what brought this memory up is that Kraglin looked at the multi-calendar and saw that it's Christmas time on Earth. Unfortunately, Nebula isn't so keen as to put on a Christmas celebration, as the Guardians are too busy trying to restore the colony of Knowhere, which they purchased from The Collector sometime after the events of Thor: Love & Thunder. 

         Peter and Rocket, meanwhile, are overseeing the renovations, with help from the newest member of the Guardians: Cosmo the Space Dog. Peter is stopped by Bzermiktokolok, who is the front man of an alien rock band that wrote a song about Christmas, and they want to play it for Peter, just to see if they got any of the lore right. The resulting song, titled "I Don't Know What Christmas Is (But Christmastime Is Here)," is easily the funniest original song ever written for a Marvel Studios production, and is almost certainly going to be a breakout hit single for this Christmas holiday season. Seriously, this song was just a banger and I loved it. 

          Before I get back to the story, let's talk about the other songs that, while not written for the special, were picked to be featured in the special and on its soundtrack. I liked them quite a lot. I think that "Christmastime" by The Smashing Pumpkins and "I Want an Alien for Christmas" by Fountains of Wayne were my personal favorites. Both of these, along with other fun Christmas tunes, were definitely fantastic choices, and I think James Gunn picked some real great ones for this special. 

       Okay, so back to the story. After the music performance, we see Mantis and Drax talking amongst themselves, as Mantis wants to give Peter the perfect Christmas, and it's because of a secret that she's been keeping from him but managed to tell Drax, and it is this: Mantis is Peter's sister, as they both shared the same father in the form of Ego. Yep, Ego the Living Planet, the maniacal antagonist of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 and father of Peter Quill/Star-Lord, is also the father of Mantis. Why hasn't she told him? Well, it's out of the fear that she would be a constant reminder of the horrible things Ego did to Peter. But, either way, she wants him to have the perfect Christmas, and Drax suggests giving Peter his personal idol as a Christmas present. 

        So, Drax and Mantis head off to Earth with one goal: collect the icon Kevin Bacon and give him to Peter as a Christmas present. However, upon arriving in Los Angeles, the two walk around Hollywood Boulevard and run into several cosplayers. Mantis confuses a Captain America cosplayer for the real Steve Rogers, freaking the poor guy out, and Drax gets angry at a cosplayer dressed as Cy-Kill from the GoBots franchise, as apparently Drax's cousin was killed by GoBots. Wait, so the GoBots exist within the Marvel Cinematic Universe? Cool! Anyway, Mantis and Drax pose for pictures and get some cash for doing so, and they head off to a local bar, where they have fun with locals, get a few drinks, Mantis dances, but no info on where to find Kevin Bacon. Outside, a lady selling Star Maps gives them a map, which they use to find the home of Kevin Bacon. 

         And I just gotta say, I think it's really great to see both Drax and Mantis be front and center for this project. The first two Guardians of the Galaxy movies put Peter and Gamora front and center, and Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is looking to focus heavily on Rocket. So, for the holiday special to center on Mantis and Drax, but predominantly Mantis is really great, and both Pom Klementieff and Dave Bautista do a phenomenal job here. 

        So, they reach Kevin Bacon's house, and he initially turns them away, only to call the police when they break into his house. A hilarious chase ensues, and we see Mantis and Drax in an altercation with the LAPD. Mantis puts many of them to sleep with her empathic powers, and we see that Drax is impervious to regular Earth bullets, even to the point of being tickled by the gunfire from a police woman. Mantis uses her powers on Kevin Bacon, and the three pick up some Christmas decorations and head out to return to Knowhere. On the way, Mantis and Drax ask about his many exploits, all of which are those of characters he played in movies like Friday the 13th and Footloose. It's here that they realize that Kevin Bacon is merely an actor, and have to convince him to be a cooler, more heroic version of himself. And we get a pretty funny nod to DC Comics and, specifically, Batman. Now, while I felt the DC Comics references in Eternals were a bit disingenuous and unnecessary, here I find it funny, and especially ironic given that James Gunn, who directed the special, also worked on DC Comics projects and is currently the creative head of DC Studios. 

        Anyway, we return to Knowhere, and Peter is just blown away by the Christmas lights and just how the entire colony was dressed up for Christmas. Unfortunately, he's far less thrilled at getting Kevin Bacon as a Christmas present, and he demands Mantis free Kevin Bacon from his trance. Now back to normal, Kevin Bacon freaks the hell out, and runs off. Peter tells Kraglin to get the Guardians' new spacecraft, the Bowie, ready to return Kevin Bacon to Earth. On the ship, Kraglin tells of how much Kevin Bacon means to Peter, and how Peter emulated Kevin's character in Footloose and saved the entire galaxy by dancing. Moved by this revelation, Kevin decides to stick around and show everyone on Knowhere a true Christmas celebration, letting his wife know that he'll be late coming home for Christmas. 

        Now, I really like the Christmas montage of the Guardians sharing gifts with each other, with Peter giving Groot a GameBoy, Nebula giving Rocket Bucky's metal arm (or at least one of his metal arms), Mantis giving Drax a stuffed elf (similar to one he picked up from Kevin Bacon's front yard and left behind), and Groot giving his fellow Guardians hand made dioramas depicting moments from throughout the special. While all of this is going on, Kevin Bacon is performing with the alien rock band from earlier, singing another original song titled "Here It Is Christmastime." Definitely another breakout hit from the special's soundtrack, and a lot of fun to listen to. And great job with the band the Old 97's portraying the alien rock band on Knowhere, with Old 97's lead singer Rhett Miller being especially fun as Bzermiktokolok. After the Christmas celebrations start to wrap, Kevin Bacon gives everyone a fond farewell and departs for his return trip to Earth. And Nebula makes a remark that, quite honestly, makes me laugh my ass off every time I watch this special, where she remarks "Well, I guess all actors aren't complete pieces of shit." 

         And what a great sport Kevin Bacon was for participating in this holiday special. Honestly, I always like seeing famous actors playing fictitious versions of themselves in a way that is humorous and playful. I also like how they had his real-life wife Kyra Sedgwick in a couple of vocal spots in this special talking with him over the phone. Kevin Bacon is great, but also having Kyra Sedgwick voice herself is a nice touch. Kudos to both of them for their participation here. 

         Peter and Mantis, overlooking the colony of Knowhere all lit up with Christmas lights, talk about the story Kraglin told earlier, and Peter finishes the story for Mantis, revealing that Yondu opened his present from Peter, revealing a toy knick knack, which he liked quite a bit and returned the gesture with a Christmas present for Peter in the form of Peter's signature pair of blasters. It's here that Mantis reveals to Peter that she is his sister, which an elated Peter considers to be the "greatest Christmas gift I could ever get." The two siblings share a warm hug, wishing each other a Merry Christmas. The final moment of the special sees Peter and Yondu flying through space, leaving a message in the stars that reads "Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to All." 

           Now, admittedly, when Marvel Studios head Kevin Feige announced this special two years ago, I was a little apprehensive about the idea. However, after watching it, I thoroughly loved it. Chris Pratt, Karen Gillan, Sean Gunn, Dave Bautista, Pom Klementieff, and the rest of the cast were all fantastic. I also thoroughly loved the animated flashback segments, as it was a neat way to see into Peter's childhood with Yondu and the Ravagers, and a really great way to bring Michael Rooker back as Yondu. I also enjoyed the other voice acting by Bradley Cooper as Rocket, Vin Diesel as Groot, and Maria Bakalova as Cosmo. James Gunn definitely made a fantastic holiday special that I think will be on the must-watch list of Christmas specials for years to come. I know it's definitely on my list. 

       What I really liked about the special is that unlike other Marvel Studios Christmas titles like Iron Man 3 or Hawkeye, where the Christmas setting was chosen merely for aesthetics, The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special was made specifically for the Christmas season, and the Christmas holiday is at the very heart of the special. Also, I definitely think that this special is more accessible than Marvel Studios' other holiday special Werewolf by Night. While that special was great for Halloween, and I definitely enjoyed it, I think that The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special is one that can be enjoyed by the entire family, and is one that can be watched multiple times throughout the holiday season. 

           I absolutely love this special, and I can't recommend it enough. Heck, people I've already recommended it to have watched it and found it to be a fun, cute holiday treat from Marvel Studios and James Gunn. I'm giving The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special a rating of 5/5, and I highly recommend watching it this holiday season on Disney+. 

         Well, this is Chuck signing off, and we're just getting started with 12 Reviews of Christmas, which will be back tomorrow with my review of Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause.